The Unspoken Burden: Balancing Marriage and Masters Degrees in Pakistan
As I sit here, reflecting on my own journey, I am reminded of the countless times I've been asked, "Why are you prioritizing your education over marriage?" The question still echoes in my mind, a haunting reminder of the societal pressure Pakistani women face to settle down young. I remember my friend, Ayesha, who was expected to get married immediately after completing her undergraduate degree. Her parents, though well-intentioned, were convinced that a master's degree would only delay her marriage prospects. But Ayesha had other plans. She wanted to pursue her master's in business administration, not just to enhance her career prospects but to prove to herself that she was capable of achieving her goals.
Ayesha's story is not unique. Many Pakistani women face similar pressures, where the pursuit of higher education is seen as a luxury, not a necessity. The joint family system, where multiple generations live together, can add to the pressure. The constant question of "Log Kya Kahenge" (What will people say?) hangs over our heads, making it difficult for women to prioritize their own dreams and aspirations.
The Reality Check
The notion that a woman needs a supportive husband to succeed is a myth. What she needs is a plan, a clear vision of what she wants to achieve, and the determination to make it happen. The current inflation rate in Pakistan, which has reached an all-time high, makes it even more essential for women to have a stable career. With the rupee depreciating against the dollar, the cost of living is increasing, and women need to be financially independent to support themselves and their families.
Breaking Free from Societal Pressure
To overcome the "Rishta pressure" and pursue their educational and career ambitions, women need to take concrete steps.
Step 1: Set Clear Goals
The first step is to set clear, achievable goals. What do you want to achieve in the next five years? Is it a master's degree, a promotion at work, or starting your own business? Write down your goals and create a roadmap to achieve them. For example, if you want to pursue a master's degree, research the best universities, prepare for the entrance exams, and apply for scholarships.
Step 2: Communicate with Your Family
Communication is key when it comes to managing family expectations. Sit down with your parents and explain your goals and aspirations. Help them understand why education and career are important to you. It's not about being disobedient or ungrateful; it's about being true to yourself and your dreams.
Step 3: Build a Support Network
Surround yourself with people who support and encourage you. Join online communities or networking groups where you can connect with like-minded women who are facing similar challenges. Having a support network can make a significant difference in your journey.
Meet Zara: A Success Story
Meet Zara, a 28-year-old woman from Lahore who pursued her master's degree in engineering despite her family's initial resistance. Zara's parents wanted her to get married, but she was determined to complete her education. With the support of her friends and a mentor, Zara was able to convince her parents to let her pursue her dreams. Today, Zara is a successful engineer, working for a top firm in Pakistan. She's married to a man who respects her career goals and supports her ambitions.
Zara's story is a testament to the fact that with determination and hard work, women can overcome societal pressure and achieve their goals.
💡 Quick Win: Take the First Step Today
If you're reading this and feeling overwhelmed, take a deep breath and start with a small step. Today, take 10 minutes to write down your goals and aspirations. What do you want to achieve in the next five years? What steps can you take today to move closer to your dreams? Remember, it's not about being perfect; it's about taking that first step towards a brighter future.
As you embark on this journey, remember that you're not alone. There are countless women in Pakistan who are facing similar challenges and overcoming them. You can do the same. Believe in yourself, stay focused, and never give up on your dreams. The pursuit of higher education and a successful career is not a luxury; it's a necessity in today's fast-paced world. By taking control of your life and making conscious choices, you can create a brighter future for yourself and inspire others to do the same.